Lucy’s Neighborhood

My son is sleeping wonderfully.  I cannot leave his room, but it is 4:38 am in the morning and he is still sound asleep.  This is really longer than he has ever slept before without waking up and getting out of bed.  He has woke up to make sure that I was still there.  When I had to go to the restroom a few minutes ago he also woke up.  However, he laid his head back down and went to sleep when I told him I would be right back.   

December 19, 2009 009

The medicines we are using are called Raspiridone and Clonodine.  Just look at my sleeping baby. : )  Ok it is back to sleep with me.  He has not hit me or kicked me once tonight.  I am so happy. 

Diary of a Wimpy Kid

Jeff Kinney

I was having alot of problems with son at night time when it was time for bed because he wanted to play computer or watch television.  When we bought this book he did his normal "No, Mommy I don't want it."  He threw it down and ran away.  He said, "No read at night time."  But, I bought it anyway.  I took the television away in his bed tonight and tonight we read one day out of the diary of a wimpy kid and talked about the issues that the boy in the book was having problems with.  Or else I talked and he listened.  But, listening for my son is good.  It usually means that I will get request for that activity again and/or that he will ask me to do it again.  So, night one of reading this book to my very intelligent but autistic son went over well. 

The book has cartoons drawn in it also, which Ryan seemed to like.  They were a more complex set of stick men and he really seemed to stare and notice the pictures.  I like this book because so far there has been no other wordly creatures to keep my son up all night.  This book is nice.  I understand that normal little boys like Superman and the Fantastic Four; however, I think that even little boys should have a balance of reading material so I would suggest this book to any child. 

Oh, so 3rd night of Medicine Change and Ryan is sleeping at the moment.  I will keep you up to date on our night, since I want to document it, especially for his doctors.  So, 11:33 pm and I am still sitting beside him but Ryan is sound asleep for at least an hour. 

This blog is for my son who is autistic.  I am going to attempt to keep a journal of his days on vox.  It is my opinion that people do not understand the full impact that autism has on a child and their family.  My son has not slept his entire life, except for a few days.  I really mean a few days.  I can literally count them on one hand.  If my son sleeps more than three hours in a row, I feel blessed.  He is constantly up and down.  We have been back and forth to the doctors. 

This past Friday we went to the doctor again.  We have been going repeatedly over the past month because Ryan really regressed after he started a new elementary school.  He progressed steadily at the school he went to before but, in the city where we are located in Ohio you are suppose to progress through the school system so when he went to his next school, he began to beat his head against the wall, throw up when we tried to put him on the bus, cry at night that he did not want to go to school, and beg me to not send him to school. 

On January 4th, 2010 he will start at St. Williams in downtown Cincinnati.  We are not rich; therefore, the only way we could afford this is through the autism scholorship that is provided to Ohio Residents of $20,000.  Our son will go 4 days a week from 12:30 pm till 3:30 pm.  Plus, they will send people to our home to help us learn how to help Ryan.  We have done programs like this before and it really seems like the best situation we were ever in. 

However, on this past Friday we took him to the doctor because he was kicking and hitting.  He was biting himself.  He was crying over and over that "the Eagle was comng."  The doctor gave us more medicine for him. 

Another problem is that our son has is he will only sleep those three short hours if I am sitting right there in his bed.  I know you are going to doubt that we are trying to establish that we are the parents and that he is the child.  I just want to say that we have tried everything, literally everything!  My husband tried to sleep with him last night to give me a break and our son screamed at him, kicked him, and hit him.  We tried, and we tried but the more tired Ryan was the more violent he was so at 5:30 am we decided that it was time for the experiment to stop because niether one of us could see any good coming out of it. 

Last night my 9 year old daughter slept in the bed in our basement because you could hear Ryan screaming so loud for me!  Tonight I have her at my mothers literally to give her a break from Ryan's new fear that an "Eagle is coming to get us."  Also, along with that there is the fact that Ryan has to slam every door five times exactly to feel like they are shut.  This has become another obssession of his.  I am hoping that this Vox site can become a haven for vox parents of Autistic Children who want to discuss issues about their children. 

I love my son more than my own life.  So, it is extremely hard to watch his pain and there is no way that anyone can tell me that these children really understand what they do or want to be this way.  It is not stubbornness as some have tried to tell me.  It is a developmental disability that impedes their ability to learn, socialize, and really live a full life. 

Cold enough for ya?

Windswept

Now that I'm back on my feet and well fed, it's time to return to my Christmas Cookie baking. Yesterday and today were chocolate-dipped coconut almond macaroons and pecan tassies (which look and taste like miniature pecan pies). I've still got to finish the chocolate Grand Marnier truffles, but hopefully will do that tomorrow.

Still have to wrap presents!

Macaroons

Pecan Tassies

Been a whopping 7 days since my last post...that's atypical..

It's not tuesday but i have some pros and cons to discuss. so:

pros:

-Finally got together with a friend last night - had a gooood time...need to get together more often

-T has been much better lately since the breakup

-Sarah and Kristen should be coming in town soon and I'm looking forward to finally meeting them after two years of being vox neighbors!

-My tree makes me smile

-Got a couple new Snoopy's

-Every Rankin & Bass production ever made. Genius.

-The amusing pictures in my head of dressing up Baby Girl as Santa and Mary as Mrs. Claus, having them sitting in rockers sipping hot cocoa. Baby Girl (Santa) would also be eating oatmeal because of the Wilfred Brimley resemblance. She would not be discussing diabetes, however.

-The fact that my head works like that is a pro and con in and of itself.

And, here's a little elf:

Jackdec09

It's 3:50 AM!

I'm wide awake.

Been awake since 2:30!

With nothing else to do, my mind wanders aimlessly through the universe of thought.

You know when you're registering on a website how they ask for a screen name and then your birthday?

That little drop down menu for your birth year goes back to frickin' 1900!

1900!!

Dude, last time I looked my 109 year-old granny isn't all that interested in your stupid website!

That's all.

I just needed to get that off my chest.

Maybe I can go back to sleep now.

I preferred to think that the tree had not been touched by human hands.  Instead, I wanted to imagine a type of botanical, seasonal transition:  that the green blood had crystallized into silver, gold and scarlet.  And when the joy could no longer be hidden, the blossoms appeared in delicate explosions.  Their thin metallic skins would shine with a clear complexion -  in colors that were pure and inspirational.

Bells And Branches

It would be impossible not to pluck this Christmas fruit from the tree that dared to bloom in the late autumn, with winter peering over the Advent horizon like a mischievous child.

A Brave Flower

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They would be irresistible.  They would have a scent like an expectant kitchen, full of spices that had traveled through history from the misunderstood continents, the lands of Western fear, of medieval confusion.  They would taste like snow falling from the festive clouds:  a profusion of crystals blowing through the white air in blissful geometry.

And inside of each one would lie a seed, a tiny window looking into the heart of the fruit.  The pulp would be flavored with these sweet prisms - with the alluring light that turned the orchards of this holiday crop into a starry countryside.

Holiday Arrangement

And now this tree was heavy with their radiance.  But I decided not to pick the glittering baubles from their branches.  I chose a different harvest.  I left the tree and its glittering yield behind, knowing that I would be enjoying its shining feast whenever I closed my eyes.

Today my wife and I celebrate thirty-eight years of marriage together.

The following lyrics explain my sentiments far more grandly than I could ever hope to express.