Two Party-Inspired Poems

Jul 12, 2009 at 2:56 PM
6 comments

Cracked Open

“Fruit? It does not fall far from the tree.”

he says about me and my daughter

“Birth is beautiful”

“Be like a kid.”

“Prosper”he says in parting.

It is a repertoire of fortune cookies

and all he has left

when he is high

Cracked open, the paper is thin

too insubstantial to hold any weight

He floats home in a cloud

of marijuana smoke

Was he ever really there?

Subtle Violence

the hipsters are back in the hood

cooler than cool

in their carefully picked faded tees

with the logos of old bands

the men wear these hats

it is a sort of uniform

and the ubiquitous joint

you don't have one,

you aren't armed

If you aren't armed

you aren't one of them

Lucy Simpson, Seattle, 7/2009

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I love the part about their carefully picked faded tees. They try so very hard to be cool, still so very afraid to accept and be the selves that they really are.

I love the pictures you paint with words and the voice in each poem. Very nice. P.S. I too love the part about carefully picked faded tees with logos of old bands. Perfect and precise in your description.

[this is good]

It was just hipster over-load! Very high people annoy me and the idea that if you don't smoke, you aren't part of the group. I have very bad asthma.

Lucy

[this is good]

I'm going to revise these poems to be a little more humanistic and less judgmental. These were just the first reactions after a party.

I remember taking a poetry class in college where we were asked to read someone else's poem out loud and then we had to give critiques, I hated it. - Poetry is something very private to me and what I learned from that class was your first instinct is usually your best. It's almost like when people say "You can never make a first impression twice". My two cents? I love the pieces the way they are - raw and real :)

I do too. I've very allergic to any kind of smoke. I miss out on a lot of live music and fun stuff cause I can't be around cigarette smoke.

Two Party-Inspired Poems

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